A to Z of hostels

Aaaaaaahostel      First on any alphabetical list, back in the day when we used that archaic                                        thing called a phone book, this hostel would hope to get lots of                                                          business just by being first on the list.

Animostel              Terrible atmosphere

Borstel                     Full of locks, keypads and chains

Bosstel                    Bossy owners, lots of rules

Coastel                    Overlooking the sea

Costel                      Hugely expensive

Crosstel                  Angry atmosphere

Dosstel                    Not very clean

Drosstel                  Even less clean

e-ostel                     Hostel of the future. Electronic check-in. No staff

Flosstel                  For dentists and dancers

Frostel                     Frosty atmosphere

Ghostel                   Haunted hostel

Glosstel                  Recently painted

Grosstel                 Never set foot in the kitchen

Hos-pi-tel             For broken backpackers

Hostile                    Don’t even go there

i-hostel                   Everyone glued to their screens, including the staff

Joshtel                    Very funny. Comedians stay here

Josstel                    Smells of incense

Kostel                      Greek themed

Lostel                       Incredibly hard to find

Moshtel                  Lots of dancing, not much sleep

Moustel                  Infested with rodents

Nostrel                  Recreational drugs snorted here

‘ostel                       Cockney themed

Poshtel                  Delicate cups, saucers and doilies. Complimentary high tea at 4pm.

Postel                    Converted Post Office

Sloshtel                  BYO alcohol

Squashtel             Too many beds in one room

Testostel                Lots of bed hopping

Voicestel               Very loud backpackers, expect no sleep

Washstel               Excellent bathroom facilities

X-hostel                 Closed down

Zzzzstel                 Comfy beds, soundproof walls, everyone sleeps well here.

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