Night of not celebrating 40th birthday goes well

A British birthday girl has woken up feeling very refreshed after a night of not celebrating her 40th birthday.

Caroline Gough would usually have celebrated a milestone birthday with a Saturday night party, but in line with current coronavirus restrictions has stayed at home instead.

“I feel great,” she said. “There is no Sambuca or Apple Sourz in my bloodstream, so I haven’t woken up with a banging headache. It’s illegal for anyone to come into my house, so I didn’t have to spend all day tidying for twelve overnight guests who needed somewhere to stay after the party. Nobody was sick in the taxi on the way home and I haven’t got to spend the day fretting because someone I forgot to invite has seen the photos of us having fun plastered all over Facebook.”

Caroline also found that organising the caterers, venue, entertainment and guest list was a lot easier than in previous years. “It was just me and Tinska in the living room with Midsomer Murder, a bit of salad and a lot of chocolate,” she said. “Then I went to bed before midnight and she stayed up running in her wheel and eating peanuts.”

This morning instead of having a huge sleep and drinking several pints of water, Caroline went paddling in the sea and chatted to the birds in her garden.

“I am looking forward to seeing my human friends again one day,” she told us. “I’ve now had two birthdays, cut my hair and grown it back again since I saw the majority of them. I can’t wait to go and give them all a gigantic hug just as soon as the time is right.”

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